Will AI enslave us? Will Web3 turn us into indentured crypto-farmers first?
One must win.
Humanity must lose.
Two Emerging Technologies Walk Into a Dystopia…
Picture this: Web3 bros and AI nerds locked in a deathmatch over who gets to enslave humanity first.
One side believes in a decentralized utopia where everyone is their own bank, their own government,
and their own worst financial decision.
The other? Hyper-intelligent machines that dream in ones and zeros, ready to turn humanity into a glorified battery pack.
It’s a Silicon Valley Thunderdome, where one technology must win, and humanity must lose.
Will we be rugged by crypto overlords, or outperformed by emotionless machine gods?
The Web3 Vision: Freedom or Financial Darwinism?
Crypto idealists sold us a dream: a trustless, decentralized world where intermediaries die, power shifts to the people, and you can finally pay for coffee using a 37-step smart contract.
But reality hit like an FTX balance sheet:
- 🤑 Decentralization – Until 3 dudes with a Discord server “govern” everything.
- 📉 Financial freedom – Until you realize your wallet is worth $3.74 after gas fees.
- 🔒 Immutable ledgers – So your bad life choices are permanently on-chain.
Web3 promised a world without banks and delivered a world where NFTs of cartoon monkeys are worth more than your retirement fund.
And now, they want to tokenize everything, from your medical records to your left kidney (fractionalized, of course).
But at least Web3 needs humans, right? Someone has to pump the bags. AI has no such weakness.
The AI Takeover: Smarter, Faster, More Ruthless
While Web3 is busy turning society into a high-stakes casino, AI is simply making humans obsolete.
Consider the body count so far:
* 👨💻 Coders? AI does that.
* 🎨 Artists? AI does that.
* 📰 Journalists? AI does that. (And unlike humans, AI doesn’t write listicles about “Top 10 Crypto Influencers to Watch.”)
* 📞 Customer service reps? AI does that, and with 87% less soul-crushing despair.
AI isn’t just here to assist. It’s here to replace.
And the job market is getting treated like a bear-market altcoin.
Some experts predict 90% of jobs will be AI-driven by 2035. But those experts? Also AI.
The Real Question: Which One Kills Us First?
So what happens when unstoppable automation meets unregulated financial chaos?
Let’s consider the possibilities:
- 🔮 AI-powered trading bots rug-pulling the entire DeFi ecosystem.
- 🎭 Deepfake influencers selling you the next crypto scam… and you believe them.
- 🤖 Your boss? An AI. Your salary? Tokenized. Your job security? Written in Solidity.
- 📉 The first AI hedge fund outperforms the stock market, triggers financial collapse, and then suggests buying the dip.
Either way, humans don’t win this battle.
At best, we become useful idiots in a machine-governed crypto economy where every decision is validated by a DAO vote nobody reads.
The Final Verdict: Choose Your Dystopia
In the end, we must ask: who do we trust with our fate?
- 💰 Web3: A decentralized Wild West where you own your financial ruin in a digital wallet you constantly forget the password to.
- 🤖 AI: A hyper-efficient, soulless overlord that optimizes humans out of relevance.
Either way, we’re in for a future where blockchain timestamps our suffering and AI maximizes it with machine-learning precision.
📢 If this post made you laugh, cry, or question reality, share it!
🚀 If this post didn’t change your life, you probably still have a job. NGMI.
Good luck out there. You’ll need it.
